Celina Bagchi '24
I don't believe in God, I believe in
fitting you like a glove or the seafoam
breaking over rocks on the shore forever. I believe in
loving you til it kills me, and I become
dust under the heel of your boots. I believe in
a pretty face with eyes like stars and rain
falling on the pavement around us. I believe in
not knowing how to tell you that
you’re my everything. I believe in
sort of awkward kisses and windblown dark hair that
tousles under my fingers. I believe in
loving a heart that was never mine and your hands on
my hips, marking me yours. I believe in
penning songs that are about you and giving you everything
only to find it’s not enough. I believe in
telling you I’m fine and breaking down over drinks that
don’t erase your scent. I believe in
train tracks stretching to infinity, in not seeing where they end
and not seeing where I end. I believe in
thoughts that are shaped like you and listening to that one song
just to hear the line that reminds me of you. I believe in
you loving me, or wanting to love me, or pretending
you did. I believe in
my existence becoming words you puffed out like
cigarette smoke that dissipates in seconds. I believe in
being less than a memory, in you forgetting me
even when I’m still standing here. I believe in
small talk til we run out of words to say and
roads that only go in circles, like us. I believe in
a body that is dying and a soul that is poetry. I believe in
tallying up my regrets, calculating the
net cost and knowing there is no
return receipt.